Is your relationship really becoming abuse-free? Answer yes or no to the following questions to find out. Make sure to check the box to record your responses. At the end, you’ll find out how to score your answers.


1) Is my partner more receptive of my opinions and activities than they were in the past?


2) Is my partner open to talking about how their behaviors make me feel?


3) Is my partner openly seeking professional help because they really do want to change?


4) Is my partner accepting responsibility for their actions and acknowledging their behavior was unhealthy and unacceptable?


5) Does my partner get upset when I express a different opinion?


6) Does my partner have a possessive attitude towards me and my actions?


7) Does my partner act like the victim for having to change?


8) Does my partner believe that I owe him or her something for changing?


9) Does my partner blame me for our problems?


10) Does my partner make excuses for abusive behavior, past and present?


11) Does my partner dismiss how much I was hurt by the abuse?


12) Does my partner not take my feelings seriously, especially those about the abuse?


13) Does my partner use small signs of disrespect, like eye-rolling?


14) Does my partner hurt me physically, even if the violence doesn't seem like a big deal, like pulling hair?


15) Does my partner substitute violence with intimidation, like punching the wall beside me instead of punching me?


16) Does my partner use pressure or guilt when it comes to our sex life?


17) Does my partner substitute violence with abusive language or emotional abuse?


18) Does my partner use methods of intimidation, control or humiliation?


19) Does my partner fall back on abusive behavior when we have arguments?



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