Supporting your partner: where to start

A good place to start is the end of making excuses for anyone who’s abusing you. Violence is always a choice and no one ever deserves to endure it.

Acknowledging and accepting responsibility for abusive behavior is the first step for your partner to change.

It’s important that people who behave abusively focus on how their actions affect their partner, their family (including children), and their community. Meaningful accountability requires accepting the seriousness of abusive behaviors and their consequences, including the possibility of consequences through the criminal legal system if the survivor chooses to pursue them. Remember that you’re not alone, and that your friends and family can support you through the recovery process.

Identify a professional program that focuses on abusive relationships and addressing the mindsets connected to abuse. Look for one that offers individual support for your partner, not couples counseling; the latter often ends up being an opportunity for abusive partners to further exert power and control through the counseling sessions.

We believe that change is possible and we’re always here to help, free of charge or judgment.

Regardless of your past, everyone deserves to have a healthy, loving relationship defined by mutual respect. Contact us 24/7 to get help for you or your partner(s).

Find local resources