By Nicole Seligman
Loveisrespect Peer Advocate
I know you said you were never, ever, ever getting back together with them, but now you're having second thoughts and aren't sure what to do. It's ok! We wrote up a little checklist to help you decide.
- I feel that I can communicate openly with this person about anything that's bothering me without getting into an argument.
- I respect this person's boundaries and I know that they respect mine too.
- I trust that this person isn't lying or cheating on me without having to go through their phone or social media to make sure.
- I do not feel afraid that this person might lash out at me verbally or physically.
- I know that this person would never pressure me to do anything I'm not comfortable with.
- I would never try to make this person do anything that they haven't consented to.
- I recognize that I can only control my own behaviors and am not responsible for anyone else's.
- I've seen significant and continuous change in this person or myself when it comes to the reasons the relationship ended.
- We encourage each other to spend time outside of the relationship with friends and activities.
- I feel that I am treated as an equal by this person.
Is there an item on this list that you weren't able to check off? Getting back together may not result in a healthy or safe relationship. Still unsure? Talk, text or chat with one of our advocates 24/7.