It’s that time of year again — spring cleaning. When you whip out your vacuum cleaners and tackle that messy closet, take a second to consider the health of your relationship. Is it what you want it to be? Are you and your partner on the same page, or at least in the same book? Here are some things to think about while you spring clean:
- Are you communicating too much, too little, too often? Do you find yourself glued to your phone, waiting for that next text or wondering too often where your partner is? In healthy relationships, opening the lines of communication is key, but constant communication may be too much.
- Do you have room to breathe? Do you still have a social life outside of that with your partner? What about the other relationships in your life? Space is essential for healthy relationships. Make sure you are not investing all of your time and energy into one relationship. Friends and family should be up there on your priority list too.
- Do you have the same goals for the future? Do you both know on what path your relationship is heading? Some relationships are casual flings and some are serious commitment material. Do you know where you stand and where your partner stands?
- Are you holding any grudges against your partner? Everyone makes mistakes, but if a mistake of your partner’s still bothers you, tell them. Don’t wait until your next disagreement to hold this against your partner. Apologies do not erase memories, but clarifying how much the incident hurt you can prevent it from happening in the future.
- Are you and your partner spending the right amount of quality time together? Taking the time to turn the phone and laptop off to spend time together is important for a healthy relationship. Make sure neither party in the relationship feels neglected. If, on the other hand, you feel like you and your partner spend too much quality time together, then put some time in your planner for quality time alone: visit a museum, go to the library or even just watch your favorite movie by yourself.
- Are you happy? This may seem like a simple question, but it can be very tough to put your finger on. Disagreements between two people are normal and it is human nature to try as hard as possible to fix what is broken. However, if the relationship has dwindled down to fight after fight over irrelevant issues, then it may be time to think about pulling the plug. Remember: your happiness in a relationship often stems from you being a happy person first.
If any of your answers are not what you want them to be, especially the last one, it is up to you to change that. Also, if you feel like you might be in abusive relationship, check out these warning signs. There is an advocate standing by at the loveisrespect waiting to take your call or answer your chats.