Power and Control Wheel
Examples of Anger/Emotional Abuse
- Putting you down
- Making you feel bad about yourself
- Name calling
- Making you think you’re crazy
- Playing mind games
- Humiliating you
- Making you feel guilty
Watch the Video
Peer Advocate Advice
Relationships should feel good, and no one deserves a boyfriend or girlfriend who makes them feel bad.
It’s a really difficult place to be in when you really like your boyfriend or girlfriend but don’t like the way they treat you.
Natalie’s boyfriend is mean, makes fun of her and calls her names. Those are red flags of an unhealthy relationship.
When a boyfriend or girlfriend embarrasses you, humiliates you, puts you down or makes you feel guilty all the time, it can be really hurtful and damaging.
There’s no excuse for anyone to use anger or emotional abuse to get what they want, and it’s never your fault if they do.
It’s Like My Relationship
If you feel you might be in an unhealthy relationship, remember there is no reason to feel any shame. This can happen to anyone. We hear from smart and successful people all the time. Don’t blame yourself — it’s not your fault.
You might think that if you just change the way you are that you can fix the relationship — but sometimes no matter what you do, the other person won’t change.
Also, remember you have options. You have the right to be in a safe and healthy relationship and the right to end an unhealthy one. It may not be easy to break up with a controlling partner, so contact us if you want to talk about it.
It’s Like My Friend’s Relationship
It’s hard to know how to support a friend in an unhealthy relationship, but remember that listening to your friend, believing them and refraining from bad-mouthing their partner will show you care.
You can tell your friend that they should never be made to feel embarrassed, humiliated or guilty by their partner. If you see a friend going through this, try mentioning it in a caring tone. Let them know in a non-judgmental way that you are worried about them and they can talk to you about what they’re going through.